SO MAYBE THERE'S HOLIDAY HOPE AFTERALL!!!

Okay, so Thanksgiving is behind us now but here comes Christmas then New Years, followed closely by Valentine ’s Day…UGH!!!

Since I was a young cub (I was never little LOL!) the Holidays have been tough. Thanksgiving was always kinda neat as it was one of the few days when dad really played the role of “father” very well. NOW HOLD ON! Don’t get me wrong!!! Loved dad & miss him lots still but he was a grumpy bear 99% of the time as he worked 2 jobs, 12-16 hours a day M-F & 4-8 hours a day on weekends, so rightfully so. Mom had open heart surgery in 1970 when it was still smoke & mirrors & couldn’t work for over a year & never really regained her full strength or endurance even though she re-entered the full time work force, working the very day before she passed away in 1984 but we’ll get to that later.

Before I came along dad had an independent TV repair business of his own & worked at a local theater chain as a projectionist nights & weekends. Once I came along he & mom decided they needed a more stable income & insurance so dad took a dayshift factory job & gave up his dream. Once color TVs came on the scene dad HAD to have one! It was like a 13” & it sat on top of our old console B&W but dad would ONLY allow it to be turned on Sunday evenings for Disney & Thanksgiving morning for the parades for like 3 years, weird I know! I guess he was afraid it’d run out of color or something LOL! Anyhow, in spite of always working the night before, he was always the one getting everybody up to gather round the TV & watch the parades as the scent of the turkey (usually burning) wafted through the house. Mom wasn’t really a cook but could burn NEARLY anything you could get near a stove! Wonder if that’s why I LOVE smoked / grilled meats today LOL?!?!? So, T’day carries fun memories I can deal with although mom’s dad ALWAYS came to visit for T’day lunch & for whatever reason(s) whenever he & dad were in the same room it was ALWAYS tense so those memories come along for the ride too.

Now we move onto Christmas. Dad’s dad raised evergreens & Christmas trees as part of his landscaping business so as a kid we ALWAYS had live trees that the Grizwald Grizzlies hand chose, cut down, drug home etc etc. Dad just HATED those plastic trees! Dad also had quite a collection of the old fashioned glass vial bubble lights which were too heavy for fake trees so another reason he resisted. G’pa had passed 10 years before I came along BUT G’ma always had us come get her a tree & us a tree from G’pas acres until she sold the place mid 70s. Since my b’day is less than a month after Christmas, I was always one of those kids that got the “combo gifts” but usually dad would make me wait until my b’day to play with’em. I could open’em at Christmas but then, to have something for my b’day, I’d be tortured for nearly a month waiting LOL! One year I got my first ever multi speed bicycle Christmas morning but then wasn’t allowed to take it out of the house until the snow was gone, which growing up in north central Indiana was nearly 3 months so it sat shiny & new in the living room awaiting spring GRRR LOL!

Now let’s take a QUICK pass through Valentine’s Day. I was one of those clumsy pudgy geeky uncool elementary school aged kids with like 2 friends total so every year I HATED Valentine’s Day!!! Why did I want to spend all evening making up &/or even simply labeling mushy cards for dumb girls that didn’t like me anyhow?!?!? NOW, fast forward to early high school! Jill, the gal I’d had a crush on for months, a cute & smart, fellow bicycle tourer, had made it clear that she wanted to be “just friends” back in October but just days before V’day we had a blizzard forecasted bad enough that they actually called school off the night before so a friend of hers threw a small evening dance party at their midtown house that we all attended. I was minding my own business; solo of course, when her BFF approached me, asking why I didn’t ask Jill to dance. Of course the “friends” conversation was seared into my frontal lobe so I just said that I was sure she didn’t want to dance with me & her friend said OH YES SHE DOES!!! & things blossomed nicely from there SOOO for a few years I LOVED V’day, until 1984. All winter 1983 mom had been battling something like the flu that her doc just couldn’t figure out but V’day eve night, while I was off at school in Chicago, she suddenly turned much worse & passed away V’day morning from heart failure before I could even get back home so of course I haven’t cared for V’day much since & for any of you who’ve followed along this year know, V’day weekend 2011 was nearly as devastating to me so obviously I’ll be glad to clear the entire Holiday season BUT at least there’s some new hope taking the scene!!!

For the past couple months there had been an occasional commenter on my bodybuilding.com bodyblog who I’ve also recently made FB friends with. While getting to know her history a bit, reading back over a few years of her amazingly well written personal blogs, I’d also noticed a pal of hers who was prolly the most common commenter on them that I’ve also befriended. Now, while getting to know these 2 a lil more it has become amazing to me just how much we share in common! We’ve certainly ALL faced life’s roller coaster but while we’ve shared the same ride, albeit in totally different parts of the country & with a lil different timing, our 3 experiences share many STUNNING similarities!

I’ve also found that they’re both MUCH like myself in that they too acquire their greatest happiness through bringing smiles & happiness to others so maybe I’m not SOOO totally screwed up after all LOL! I must admit though that I HAVE to wonder what really happens when codependent personalities depend on each other LMBO!!! Guess we’ll just all have to learn to take turns =) I distinctly remember a tender conversation about a year ago, explaining that bringing happiness to someone first, ahead of my own, was VERY important to me & her arguing that once in a while I had to take turns, letting her enjoy that experience too SOOO, it can be done LOL!

Maybe the Holidays don’t have to totally suck after all!!!

Guess we’ll just have to hide & watch!!!

Rock on pals! Your crazy (but maybe not SOOO crazy) Memphis pal, Griz